Tuesday, August 4, 2009

The Elderly

Do the elderly really serve a purpose? I have come to the conclusion, yes, and it is to irritate me. Since I have moved, I have had more exposure to old people than ever before. It seems they have nothing better to do than block the aisles at Wal-Mart, cause traffic accidents, crowd the doctors' offices, and obsess over their lawns. Daily I am hit with an urge to mow one down with my grocery cart, run them off the road with my car, or just go take a big dump right on their front lawn. Obama may have it right for once--cut off their healthcare and let them die.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

De Nile Ain't Just A River Baby

For the past couple of months, I've been living in De Nile. I am in denial that this is actually where I am going to be living for the next 20 to 40 years, or at least until Matt retires, which at that time, we are moving to The Villages for free golf for life. But, denial can be a crippling thing. Day after day, I limp along in life waiting for something to change. I am waiting to start my life, but I don't know on what I am waiting. I make excuses for myself. I am waiting on warm weather or I am waiting until we buy a house or I am waiting on kids sports to start or I am waiting until I lose 5 pounds or I am waiting on a good hair day. Some of these things have happened and some have not, but either way, it has not changed my daily rountine of life enveloped in nothingness. But, this is not new for me. Waiting for the next big thing has generally been my issue ever since I can remember. I am the world's worst procrastinator. Everything will be done tomorrow. I waste my days and spend most nights watching T.V. until I fall into a coma. Megan Kelley and Bill Hemmer on Fox News are my best friends. We get together every morning from 8-10 and discuss the issues of the failed Obama administration. They actually do most of the talking, but I enjoy listening. My favorite part is the "Earmark of the Day". They really crack me up. Now I know that may sound lame, but I also have my virtual friends on FB. I get to read about them daily, and I let them know what I'm up to--watching TV, sitting, staring, etc. It's quite the social life I have going on here. As great as it is, I guess I am realizing that this is no way to live FOR THE NEXT FEW DECADES. So today I started doing those things that I was going to do tomorrow. I made doctor, dentist, orthodontist, and hair appointments for the girls. OK, I know it's a small step, but at least it's a step. I am also posting on my blog! YEAH ME! Blog posting is like taking a big dump. You just feel better after it's done. And to keep moving forward, I am joining the local gym--if not for working out, for the social aspect of actually getting out of this cardboard box I live in and seeing other human life during the day. I'll let you know how that goes in a subsequent post. I know many of my old friends told me to take advantage of not having any obligations or places to be. They suggested "NO Commitments for Six Months!" Apparently these people have never actually tried it themselves. It's quite an empty and self-absorbed existence. Even I (who loves me) can have too much me time. It's time to face reality, let go of the denial, and start living my new life here.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Jabberjawing with the Jehovah's Witnesses

Going about my normal routine on Monday morning, doing laundry, watching Fox News, and cleaning up the house from the weekend, I hear a knock at my door. Since I just moved to town, I knew it had to be some sort of solicitation. Ugh. I looked out the window and saw two ladies with Bibles in hand. This was going from bad to worse. I live in a rental, so coming up with an excuse not to buy something is no problemo! It's the basic "I'm broke" argument. But sending away two sweet ladies with Bibles in their hands is another story. I opened the door and they asked if they could share something from the Bible with me. And, instead of just saying yes and come in, I told them I was a Christian and I already attended a local church in hopes that they would say ok, we can check you off the big list, and see you later. Well, that didn't seem to deter them. They really just wanted to read a few Bible verses with me. It was cold on the porch, and all the heat was escaping my house, so I let them in. I have absolutely nowhere for anyone to sit in the entry room in my rental, so we stood. She read a nice passage and asked me what I believed. I told her Jesus was the way the truth the life and no one comes to the Father but through Him. They agreed. Then they told me they were Jehovah's Witnesses. I let out an audible groan before I could even stop it from coming out of my mouth. They laughed and said that they were not as bad as what I had been told. I was embarrased. I really didn't mean to do it, it just happened. We talked for another 10 to 15 minutes about our beliefs. I'll give you the rundown. They believe in "go ye therefore teaching all nations" which is exactly what they were doing and why they do the door to door thing. They believe Jesus is the way and that it is about a relationship with Christ. They don't believe in war which could be debated by Christians and nonChristians all over this world. Frankly, I didn't see any "deal breakers" in what I believe vs. what they believe. No, that doesn't mean I'm leaving my new church, but I don't understand why they get such a bad rap. Maybe they didn't give me the full pitch about having to handle snakes or talk in tongues, but I enjoyed their little visit. Maybe that gives you an idea about how bored I really am here in my new home.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

The Bloginning

I have just moved to a new town. I like it. Right now I'm cruising along with my old friends from home on facebook and cell phones. Haven't really felt too detached. However, with Super Bowl parties quickly approaching and no invitation on the horizon, me thinkest I needest some closer friends. Kind people from home have offered me phone numbers of locals who are friends of a friend or relatives of a friend or some other strange connection. Maybe I should take them up on it, but frankly I'm not that desperate yet. I can't think of a more awkward conversation than "Hey you don't know me, but I have no friends here and somebody gave me your phone number and so will YOU be my friend?" Little weird, eh? Anyway, I've decided to blog my adventures as I meet new people, visit new churches, and discover all that this little town has to offer.